- An anonymous poster on Reddit says her future mother-in-law asked her to bring a dish to the family Thanksgiving celebration — but she didn’t realize she would be expected to use the old family recipe for sweet potato casserole
- When the woman showed up to the meal with a different variation of the dish, the mother-in-law got mad
- Now, the mother-in-law has launched a group text and declared that she won’t be hosting Thanksgiving in the future
A woman says her future mother-in-law is mad at her after she brought a sweet potato casserole to an early Thanksgiving dinner — and didn’t use the old family recipe.
In a post shared to Reddit, 28-year-old woman writes that her fiancé’s family had an early Thanksgiving get-together, and she was asked to bring a homemade dish.
“Shortly after plans were made I get a text from MIL asking if I want to bring a dish,” she writes. “I love to cook, it is one of my main hobbies … After I say yes, she asks me to make sweet potato casserole. Very easy, I’m happy to do it.”
Roughly one week before the dinner, the woman’s future mother-in-law sent her a photo of a written recipe for sweet potato casserole with a message attached: “let me know if you have any questions!”.
“I heart reacted the message and left it at that. She had not mentioned sharing a recipe with me previously and sent this without any context, I assumed she was just trying to be nice,” the woman writes. “Additionally, I am not a fan of marshmallows, and the recipe she sent included them and white sugar instead of brown- double the amount I would normally put in a sweet potato casserole.”
Prior to the dinner, the woman set about making her own version of the dish — one with brown sugar instead of white, and a pecan crumble topping instead of marshmallows.
When the couple got to his parents’ house later that day, her mother-in-law took the dish and brought it to the kitchen.
When it came time to eat, everyone assembled to eat buffet-style — and that’s when the woman noticed something was up.
“I ended up going towards the end [and] noticed not a single person had taken any of my sweet potato casserole,” she writes. “I tried not to feel dejected by it since we were having a great time. Later, I got up to refill my plate and noticed again barely any casserole was eaten.”
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After the meal, the woman approached her mother-in-law, asking what she thought of the dish.
“She flat out said she didn’t eat it and neither had anybody else because I had ‘rudely’ not followed the recipe she sent,” she writes. “I said that I didn’t realize the recipe she sent was a requirement, I thought she was just trying to be helpful. I then get a private lecture in the kitchen about the ‘etiquette’ of Thanksgiving and that if someone asks for a specific dish, then it has to be made so everyone attending will like it.”
She continues: “I was so embarrassed and trying not to cry because she has never spoken to me this way ever. I told her that I never intended to upset her and that the casserole I made still tasted like sweet potato casserole like it wasn’t an entirely new dish or anything, but she held firm that it was rude of me to completely ignore the recipe I sent and that some members of the family had quietly come to her and complained about it (no idea if this is true, no one else said anything to me).”
After the dinner, the woman confided in her fiancé, and he sent a strongly-worded text to his mom, telling her she had overreacted.
One day later, both the woman and her fiancé were added to a group text with several other members of the family, including his mom, who wrote: “Since certain people have a problem with the way I host Thanksgiving, I will not be hosting it again next year.”
The woman later sent her fiancé’s mom another apology, saying she had “a lovely time,” and didn’t mean to cause any issues.
But the mom never responded.
Commenters have weighed in, with almost everyone siding with the woman who wrote the post — and arguing that the mother-in-law did, indeed, overreact.
“You weren’t told the recipe was mandatory, and your MIL overreacted to a misunderstanding about a dish you lovingly prepared,” wrote one.
“MIL is a control freak and is being childish and over reacting big time,” added another. “She could have explained that she wanted it made a certain way, but I personally think it’s rude to ask someone to make a dish and then expect them to make it her way.”